Have you ever felt the urge to leave everything and run?
Has your skin ever craved to hold someone so close that they never get away?
How many nights have you cried yourself to sleep? Thinking of your bleak past, thinking of the present you are not in his arms, and the uncertain future?
Have you spent majority of your life longing for a person/ persons? Mourning?
How many times have you made someone the centre of your life? And how many times have they left?
Have you stalked someone so bad that you know what they've done even if you've blocked all contact with them? And then follows the urge to cry, doesnt it? Cuz its only you who is unhappy, you who is still guarded.
Have you been crushed with disappointment, jealousy and an unshakeable feeling of having failed everyone you know?
Have you pictured your life with someone? Doing things you never thought even possible in your life? Because it doesn't resonate with your image of your future, not that it ever will happen.
How many times have you let your guard down. Trust someone enough to tell them about your demons. And how many times have they left you alone with your demons?
How many times a day do you fight the urge to burst out into uncontrollable tears? And how many times do you?
Is this what love is? Really? No. It can never be. Why are you holding on to something so toxic? Why are you letting it control your present?
How many chances have you given this person/ People? How many times have you realised that your happiness is somehow tied to one person? How many times have you realised a few days later that what you feel for others will never be what they feel for you?
Why do you give other people chances when the only thing you should bet upon is you?
In the words of J D Salinger you can't be running back and forth forever between grief and high delight. Will you now start living for yourself?
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