The memory Box.

While the rains did mumbai in again last weekend, I decided to do something that I'd been delaying for some time now.. Cleaning. Not that I don't like to clean but with my borderline OCD I need it to be done perfectly, so it takes a minimum of two days to get my room in that perfect order.. And since I have nothing better to do I thought I might as well get it done with..

There's a lot of things to clean as well, that's another reason I'd been delaying.. And also cleaning and throwing away old stuff go hand in hand.. How can I throw anything away when each thing has its own memories?

I'm a sucker for old things.. I collect trinkets, stones, stamps, coins, shells, christmas cards, birthday cards, stickers...even used gift wrapping paper. Of course I have to open each one of those collections while cleaning.. See all of the stuff Ive collected over the years.. All those memories.. Who gave me what in which gift wrapping paper... So now u know why my cleaning takes time??

There's even a cookie box filled with ID cards...From 9th (cuz if you remember we dint have any before 9th) all the way until ty.. maybe I can show my grandchildren in the distant future how I cards were at our time, (hopefully they will laugh more at the ID than make fun of my pic)

Earlier after each school academic year, without even waiting for the second day of vacation, my job would be clearing my study table of all the years books, papers and replacing them with fiction books that I bought for my birthday, which conveniently falls between the exam and the results. This was the first time in 6 years I had that opportunity again.. And I love it!! All the books that actually are important in my life are back to their usual place, right in front of me.. And to think it took 6 years to get it back where they belong.. :)

I'm a hoarder, I hoard memories.. Like the pink belt with an ornate buckle for which I had a big argument with my parents in the middle of the mall but never used and finally had to throw cuz the leather wore away due to non use, Obviously i had to tear away the buckle, how else would I remember that I had such a pink belt (And that argument)
Like the metal bead thingy that was on one of my favourite frocks back when I was 12, how else would I remember all the parties I've worn it to?

Like the birthday cards my friends made/got me, the cover of a book I borrowed from someone but forgot to return, the shells and stones that I and a friend used to go looking for in the sand at the construction site near home, the index sheets we used for projects at school, even the school writing sheets.. Everything has its own unique memory.. and each one triggers another..

You know what I mean, Like those shells I said I collected, I remember the black sand, the daily going down to play in the colony grounds, the friend, where she is now... And then I get all aww-Those-were-the-days-kind-of-faced..

I have a special draw in my study table for these old things.. The memory box I like to call it.. things like toyotas calendar that used to come with the jan issue of rd (4 consecutive years that too), like the black string thing inside a cassette of a album I loved but got bad, like the slam books and autograph books my friends filled up, like the friendship bands I've received over the years, like my first ever writing venture (yes it was fantasy, fiction and dint get past chap 3) and all other of my writing ventures ( 2 more, still fantasy, fiction and dint get past chapter 2)

I know what you are thinking, I'm a fool right? that its time to move on? That its already past the time to throw most of them out? Maybe you are right.. Maybe some of them should have been thrown out a long time ago, but then what would I do on rainy weekends like these when I have nothing better to do??

nUmBEr gaMeS

Numbers intrigue me. A lot..
(not 1,2,3 stupid, I meant data.. Stats.. Ranks, etc) And No,its not the reason why I'm in this profession..

Its amazing actually that you are one among 7 billion people on earth.(est).How many do we actually know? Maybe a thousand. (That's like less than 0.00001%) And I am one among 1.2 billion in India. and maybe one among I dunno how many million (Definitely million, you'll agree i know) in Mumbai. How is it that there are so many people around you and you don't get to meet that one person you've been wanting to meet for so long? (Just to make it clear to people who know me.. No, not him. Yes, some one else)



Earlier I was one among 0.8 million students trying to(I know, less trying, more praying and more cursing)crack one of the toughest exams in the world.Now that I'm on the other side I'm one among the 0.175 million members of a supposedly great and respectable profession.
my most memorable number before that has to be in 2nd grade.. 2nd in the whole section and the least.. well being somewhere in the middle of the upper half among the 300 students in 10th (you really thought that i would disclose it, that too on public domain?? )



One of the 6000 people who cleared this time (breaking all records). I am humbled by that of course, feels like the what you did isn't all that great..(i know... its an achievement, but really, is it good enough?) One of the I dunno how many who don't have to give any more exams (according to most of the thousand i mentioned earlier). And now.. One of the scores of people who don't have a job. (Aaargh). Thank you US for fuelling another downturn rumour. Thank you all Companies/Firms/Banks/Industries for giving me a number in that list as well...


So when the jobless data comes in from india, I'm one of those in that subset.. No actually I'm sure there's another subset with no interview calls.. Well rite, I'm in that set (i've had it.. Waking up before 10 everyday ( of course, what will the hr guy think if he hears my just woken up voice) and keeping the revered phone nearby until 6 and rushing to it every time my tone plays with an unknown number, only to hear old hindi never heard before songs which the phone company wants u to put as ur tune or xyz bank/co. asking if you want insurance.. No u retards, I want a job.. >_< )

What's my number? That's one question I've been longing to answer in an interview.. But apparently HR guys aren't really interested in your number (the retirement one ie, not phone no..)
They just want to muddle you, so much so that you start doubting why you should be even conversing with him when you could be doing better things like banging the phone lying on the desk on his head/ or ur portfolio (atleast one good use of all your certificates)

Why is it that you are always one among many.. why cant you be unique in anything? Why is it that you always have competition? Always have people judging you... what number you are among those many.. Why cant people just leave me alone..Its so much more easier to live life that way.. Not thinking about someone doing better than you.. Or worse than you.. But then again that would be too easy right?

Maybe someone can find a way in between.. Not so difficult.. Not so easy.. Well until then or maybe until I get a job or even an interview, I will keep posting these stupid things..
You, just have to deal with it..